The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
