Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize