i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
