Soap is not a condiment
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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