You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
