She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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