I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I feel like a drive thru vagina
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Randomize