You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Randomize