what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
