Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
