Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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