she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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