Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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