on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
