I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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