In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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