My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
