I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
