I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
