I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize