I'm jealous of your bromance
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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