Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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