you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!