When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
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