she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
