She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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