Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize