I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Please, let me fuck your mom
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
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