I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize