I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
