question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
