He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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