Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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