I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
