the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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