I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
