their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
