All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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