Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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