you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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