Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
