I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
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