I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
