BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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