after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
