Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
