Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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