I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize