you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
