Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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