around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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