I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
